Back to school
by Cactusin
Summary: When about to attend her third year at McKinley high, Rachel is surprised as Jesse has begun there. What are his intentions? Is that the only thing to be discovered after the summer?
1. Chapter 1

Rachel can feel how people stare at her and Finn when they walk into the doors of McKinley high on the first day of school after the summer. It could be, she imagined, that they were glowing. Or the height difference, even if that was far less exciting.. It could also be that she had persuaded Finn to wear matching outfits for the first day of school as an official couple.

"This feels weird" Finn said as he gazed over the crowd.

"They are only jealous of how your terrific body can pull it off, when they would look horrible in it."  
"No.. I don't think so."  
"I do." she says and stands on her toe to give him a peck on the lips. "Anyway. Are you going to keep living life in a way that other people will not notice you and not look at you? That is not very sta-"  
"Wait" Finn interrupts. "Isn't that.." he doesn't fullfill the sentence with makes Rachel follow his look.  
"Jesse St. James" she says in chock and gasps.

"Come on" Finn says and tightens his grip around her waist as he drags her to Jesse's position.  
"No, Finn, I don't think it's a good idea.."  
"I do."  
"Jesse St. James" Finn says, and silences. He hadn't really figured out what to say next.

"Tall freak" Jesse says and puts on his showface. A face that grows really stiff as he notices Finn's grip around Rachel's waist – which they do not notice. "Rachel."

"You really have no right coming around here man" Finn says, shaking his head.

"Unless you wanted to be beaten up" Puck adds, joining the conversation.

"UCLA found out about Vocal Adrenaline's grade system and for me to get in I had to attend an additional year at another high school nearby. Appearently, you have the second best reputation and no corruption." Rachel scoffed at the inside, thinking of Sue. "I am not going to let other people ruin my future."  
"Are we supposed to believe that?" Rachel asks. "You only came here to spy on us again and ruin everyone's life."  
"I think you guys are way to self-centered."  
"Is that seriously coming from you? Mr. Having a picture of himself in the background to look at occassionally while making out?"  
"What?"

"Sorry Finn."  
"Nevermind."  
"Dude, that is.." Puck pauses, remembers that he hates this guy. "totally not rocking."  
The bell rings.  
"Excuse me, I have to attend class. I don't want to waste this year" Jesse says as he walks off in a hurry.

"Can you believe that guy?" Finn says, shaking his head.

"He egged Rachel. Who can do that can do anything" Puck says, ignoring the slushing.

"Thanks Puck."

"Àgreed. How could anyone with a heart hurt you?" Finn says and kisses Rachel, ignoring breaking up with her to date two cheerleaders.

Now after seeing Jesse again, Rachel couldn't help but the daydream that she had had. That she had had way too often, especially during the early days with Finn. She and Finn was talking, when someone threw stones at the window.

"Is it raining?" Finn asked with a puzzled look.

"I don't think so. I'll go look." Rachel said and moved to the window. And behold, there stood Jesse, as handsome as ever.

"What are you doing here?" she yelled.

"A love-struck Romeo sings the streets a serenade  
Laying everybody low with a love song that he made.  
Finds a streetlight, steps out of the shade  
Says something like, "You and me babe, how about it?" he sang in response.  
"Rachel says, hey, it's the jerk Jesse St. James. He nearly gave me a heartattack, this after egging me. He's underneath my window. She says. Hey la, my boyfriend Finn is here. You shouldn't come here singing songs like that. Anyway. What do you even want?"

"Hey Rach, what's going on?"Finn says as he moves to the window. "Jesse?"

"RACHEL. I can't be without you anymore. I love you. I always have, I always will. I only threw eggs at you because when I thought I had to leave, I could not leave with you thinking I was half-decent. I only did it so you could forget me! It broke my heart! It broke my soul! Please, forgive me, or I cannot live! I would die, just like Romeo did!" Jesse screams out and almost break out in tears.

Rachel stared at him, with longing in her eyes. She couldn't. She couldn't resist such a declaration. What was to oppose it? Oh no. Finn.

"Finn.. This, I.."  
"Rachel, it's okay. He clearly loves you and understand you in a way I never possibly can. I will never find a girl like you again, but I will find love again."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes. And run out to him, as I take the backdoor out and go home without interrupting you."  
Rachel cast Finn a grateful look, before running down into Jesse's arms and being buried with passionate kisses.

"And so Romeo finally gets his Juliet" Jesse says while crying, this time out of joy.

Mr Schue was talking about something in spanish, but half-way through it didn't make any sense to Rachel Oh no. She had daydreamed once more.


	2. Chapter 2

"So guys, as you know tons of new kids plus some older kids who have gained enough confidence to join has requested a new audition. It will be hold Monday next week. I would like if a few of you joined me to help make my decision." Mr Schue gets right to the point on this glee meeting.  
"I'll join!" Rachel screams out at once with true glee in her voice.

"Thank you Rachel. Anybody else?"  
"Why would we want to? Everything is hopeless." Tina says in a very depressed tone.

"Ehm." Will looks at her, with a stunned face, clueless on what to say.  
"Tina, losing Artie was not that big of a loss." Mercedes say. "He's pure vanilla. You can do better."  
"Hey!" Artie screams out, with a voice filled of indignation.

"Stop you guys. I don't want this year to start off on the wrong foot. Anyone else who wants to join?"  
He looks out in the room, but nobody makes a movie, nobody make a sounds.

"You guys, I need more than one of yours perspective. I don't want me and Rachel to get yelled at for the rest of the year for picking the wrong ones. How about you Finn?"  
"Finn will join, won't you?" Rachel says and pokes him.  
"Ehm, sure." he says, which makes Rachel smile at him.  
"Good, so that's 2! That's still only a sixth of the group. I need a fourth!"  
"Wait, so you want to remove two people?" Brittany says with a deadpan face.

"No, I think he wants to add two" Finn says, biting his lip.  
"You guys are stupid" Quinn says with a sigh. "He is saying he wants 3 people, 12/4 is 3, just like 12/2 is 6."  
"That's my girlfriend" Artie screams out with joy. This leads to Tina running out, almost crying.

"Real smooth dude" Puck sighs.

"I'll go after her" Mercedes says and starts moving.

"No, stay. We can deal with this issue later." Mercedes returns to her seat. "Now I need one more person to the auditions and some song suggestions."  
"I have tons!" Rachel says. "First, I thought we could do-"  
"First the third member Rach."  
"Fine" she says with a pout.

"I'd join but I'm a dancer not that much of a singer."  
"That's okay Mike, we could use a dancer's perspective as well."  
"Cool."  
"So, we all agree? Rachel, Finn and Mike will help me decide which people to add to the group?"

"Yes, we all agree." Rachel says before anyone could react. "So, as for the songs. I think we should do something from Hair, Let The Sunshine In to show our true optimism. Then, for something a little more modern.."  
"Hair is only a bunch of hippies. Can't we do something from School Of Rock instead?" Puck cries out.

"Hey, I think Hairspray would be better. Don't you agree mr. Schuee?" Matt wonders.

"Wait was that an Will-hair reference? Never mind. We can't agree right now. First the new members must arrive so we can be a democracy and they can feel welcome."  
"So what? We're not going to practice anything today?" Mercedes sighs. "Then what's the point of being here? I could have comforted Tina by now."  
"The point of being here is too discuss the future of the club, which will have much to do with the new additionals."  
"Couldn't we just have had the meeting after they joined then? You could just go around and ask us if we wanted to join."  
"Perhaps Santana, but I think it's important to have a meeting with the core group before."  
"Why? So we can sit and discuss nonsense?"  
"No, Mercedes. So we can catch up."  
"So, what have you done over the summer then mr. Schue?"  
"Not much."  
"Pining after Emma?" Kurt asks and with a sigh thinks of Finn. How obsessed he used to be with Finn. And how soon he got over it when Finn started dating Rachel.

"I don't really think that's appropriate."  
"Oh, and I want to be a part of the audition-thingy" Kurt then adds as he realizes that if the students represented would be Mike, Rachel and Finn Rachel would be the only vote since Mike and Finn would hardly have the courage to disagree with her. He would, however.  
"Alright, so that's a third of the group then! Awesome."  
"Wait." Brittany says. "So is Finn and Rachel the same person now?"

***New scene ***

"Hey Kurt. Want to follow me to see what people have signed on?" Rachel asks Kurt as they leave the room. She imagines them sort of friends now, after having spent much of the summer in the same group.  
"No, I have more important things to do." Kurt, while tolerating Rachel does still not fully approve.  
"Alright. Puck?" Puck was her friend. After he had patched things up with Finn, they all used to hang out. Rachel, Puck, Finn and often Kurt too.

"Only to see if any hot girl has signed on" he exclaimed while he intensely nodded his head.

"This Quinn business really hurt you huh?"  
"Nah, I'm just not meant for one woman."  
"Good thing we broke up."  
Soon enough they reach the board.

"Anna Tilney, Steve Jordan.. only a bunch of dudes and girls I don't know of."  
"None of these people have captured my looks in the hallway. I don't think they have star potential."  
"Wait, there's Jesse's name."  
"Of course there is. He only came her to sabotage us. I think Vocal Adrenaline's new coach is even more ruthless than -" she gets quiet.

"Shelby." Pucks say, and bites his lip. "Have you met her since the Beth-drama?"  
"No." she says, as it doesn't feel weird saying it. "Have you?"  
"She doesn't want Beth to see me."  
"Oh." Rachel wondered what Shelby had felt when her dads didn't allow Shelby to meet her. "I'm sorry Puck."  
"Eh." he simply said.

"You don't have to feel embarrased to show your true feelings, you know?"  
"What feelings?" Rachel gives him a look that he ignores."Actually I need to go talk to.. Matt now. See you later."  
"Alright."  
Rachel looked after Puck and thought that he had acted different lately. While talking far more about hooking up, she had never seen him even kissing a girl. He was lots of talk and not as much action before, now it was tons of talk and no action. She felt sorry for him. He must still be crazy about Quinn, who apparently was dating Artie now. That was something she had missed. She never figured he was her type since he wasn't mr. Popular, but sure. She could see however how Artie was attracted to Quinn, even though she was still a bit bitchy.  
"AND DON'T YOU COME BACK!" a voice screamed close-by. Rachel turned around to see Jesse walking out of Sue's office with a expression impossible to read. Not that she wanted to read it.


	3. Chapter 3

"Hi everybody, I'm mr. Will Schuester, in charge of New Directions, McKinley high's glee club. So, the performances will be in order after the list here, so in the order of which you signed it. With that, Anna Tilney, come on up."

Will goes to take his seat as the first one to audition entered the stage and there is total silence in the hall.

"Hi. I'll be doing My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion" she says with a smile.

"A bit cliche but good choice!" Rachel whispers loudly.

"Every night in my dreams.."  
She continues on singing, but does a rather mediocre job. Finn writes down "ok?", Mike writes down "very still", mr Schuester "not bad, but not extraordinary, not a essential asset to the group". Rachel in order writes down "shows lack of emotion and a narrow range – very lackluster. A crime to the excellence of Celine Dion." Kurt writes down pretty much what Rachel says, though in different wording.

Many keep on singing and while most are mediocre, some are quite good and some are downright horrid to the extent that Rachel cannot bear to hear it. Then, comes the last name on the list; a name deliberativey putten down last, for the drama effect."  
"And last is.. Jesse St. James?" Will says and wrinkles his forehead.  
"Hello gang. I will perform an Elton John classic. Your song." Jesse moves over to the piano and pushes Brad away.

"What is he doing here?" Will asks Rachel.

"Beats me. He said it had to do with grades."  
"Oh, this is trouble if anything is."  
They continue on listening to Jesse with politeness. He sings the song with true grace and talent but none of Glee club members acknowledges this.  
"Thank you Jesse.." Will says with a sigh. Soon enough all of those who have auditioned leaves the room.

"So, who would you like to join?" Rachel says, determined not to acknowledge Jesse's audition.

"I thought Steve rocked" Finn says with a smile. Steve had sung Slow Ride by Foghat.  
"I agree. He sang good while doing a pretty rad dance routine" Mike says and nods.

"He was pretty sweet" Kurt agrees. "Though my favorite was Miranda."  
"She was off pitch sometimes but she had raw talent" Rachel agrees. "She and Danny are my picks. Danny could really handle those low notes. I think we need another male bass."  
"Well, that's 3 people that I can all agree with. So, any discussions on people you don't want joining out of those or are we pleased with that?"

"I'm pleased. Those 3 will do just fine" Finn says and everyone agrees.

"So, that's it then. Let's just hope that the rest of the groups don't wanna cut our heads of when we meet on Thursday."

**New Scene***

"You wanted to meet me?" mr Schue says as he walks into Mr Figgins office on Wednesday two days later. There, he realizes that Figgins is not alone there. Jesse and Sue Sylvester are both sitting there, looking rather upset.

"Yes. I have received a complaint from ms. Sylvester and mr. James about you. They say you were unfair in picking out the new members for New Directions. They say that Jesse deserved a place but didn't get one."  
"I can say that he did not in fact deserve a place."

"I think many would disagree."  
"This is ridiculous. He won with Vocal Adrenaline last year."  
"So what is this Sue?" Will says a bit louder and nearly stands up. "You have a new respect for New Directions? Or is this some ploy to get Jesse to spy on us again and ruin our spirits?"  
"Can't I have some new-found admiration of the club?"  
"Yes. No. Figgins, this is ridiculous. Can't you see she's playing you?"  
"Will, it's obvious you're biased when it comes to mr St. James. I can not accept this – Jesse deserves another audition."  
"That's right Figgins. If I remember we live in a place called the United States of America which is supposed to stand for liberty and fairness." Jesse says.  
"Aren't you the guy who said that we treated you horribly? Why would you want to join without an alterior motive?"  
"I have changed a lot since my last stay here at McKinley high. I've been doing some yoga, some meditation and been drinking some relaxing herbal tea. I can honestly say that I'm completely different person now."  
"The problem wasn't your stress revel. The problem was you egging one of our own members."  
When hearing this, Jesse bits his lips and something in his eyes change.

"I will hear no more of this Will. The boy deserves a second chance and an impartial audition."  
"You know what? Okay, fine. Who will decide when it comes to this 'impartial' audition then?"

"Ms Sue, Ken Tenaka and we will allow Sandy back for this purpose alone."


	4. Chapter 4

Everyone was laughing, everybody was fun when Will walked in to the room with a slight smile on his face.

"So, I now have the honor of introducing the Glee Clubs newest members! Say hi to Steve, Miranda and Danny!"

The whole group cheers as the three young and somewhat shy members walk in.  
"But this is not the only news. We may get another member."  
"Who?" Kurt asks, with a puzzled face. Did Rachel go behind everybody's back?  
"A guy most of you know who was in the group last year. Apparently Jesse St. James is re-taking his last year here and some other people will decide his destiny in this club."  
"Wait what? Jesse? How can we allow a spy back in?" Santana exclaims.

"Well, technically you were a spy and you're still in" Mercedes says and shrugs her shoulders.  
"That's right Mercedes" mr Schuester says, even if his opinion of Jesse is no different from the opinion of the group.  
"Hey, I didn't say it was alright. He infiltrated the group and tried to ruin us."  
"Yeah, and he's not even smart enough to finish school in time" Brittany adds, which leads to many looks. "What?"

"Can they really do that? I mean, after what he did do Rachel and all that" Finn asks and Puck nods agreeingly.  
"Look, I'm not happy about this either. But we must make the best of the situation, if he is to re-join the club."  
"Who decides whether or not he gets in then?" Artie wonders.

"Coach Tenaka, Sandy and Sue Sylvester."  
"Oh come on!" Puck says angrily and the complaints are to be heard everywhere. Rachel sits quiet though, staring at the floor.

"I'm confused" Danny then says. "Who's Jesse St. James?"  
"He attended Carmel High and transferred here. He then broke up with one of our members, egged her with the rest of the group, and re-joined vocal adrenaline."  
"Wow. That's cold." Miranda says with eyes wide open.

"Yes, but we must look at the bright side. At least he's a good vocalist" Quinn points out.

"Exactly" Artie agrees instantly and they squeeze each others hands, luckily with Tina sitting on the other side of the room, staring only at Will.

"But let's move on from that now, shall we?" Will says. "We need to start rehearsing some numbers. Any of the new members who have some suggestions on what to sing?"  
All three sits quiet.

"If none of them-" Rachel begins.

"I love that you have suggestions Rachel, but I think we should let the newbies have some. Come on, none of you? Don't be shy!"  
"I'd like to sing something out of Wicked" Miranda says.  
"YES!" Kurt and Rachel screams in unison and look at each other.

"That sounds cool" Puck agrees, which leads to many confused look. "What? I can't like musicals?"

"Steve, Danny, what do you say?"  
"Sure" Steve says.  
"I'm sure that's cool" Danny says nodding his head slightly.

"Good, so that's a plan. Which song did you have in mind?"  
**  
* New scene**

"I'm so excited!" Sandy squeals. "To be back at McKinley high!"  
"To make it clear Sandy" Figgins say as he walks him to the auditorium "You are only here as a judge on Jesse's talent, you won't be back later."  
"Oh, that's silly talk."  
"No, it's not. I can't have you back in for more."  
Sandy rolls his eyes at this, but keeps quiet as he joins Sue and Ken in the auditorium.

"I don't know why you talked me into this" Ken says in a monotone voice. "I can't stand the thought of anything close to Emma."  
"Sure you can. Be a big boy. Show her that you have your own opinions!" Sue says, while she of course not is going to let Ken oppose her.

"So, when does the star arrive? Jesse is superb. He sang Run Joey Run beautifully and is a gorgeous boy!" Sandy says as he sits down next to them.

"Oh, you perve." Sue says, totally satisfied.

"So, can I sing now?" Jesse asks directly when he enters the stage.

"Go on" Sue says loudly.

"So here is Your Song. You know who you are" Jesse says and tries to wink, but the waving from Sandy throws him off. "It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside"

"Good huh?" Sue whispers in Ken's ear. "I think this is just like Emma's taste.

"You really think so?"  
"Absolutely!"  
"Yeah, I guess."

The song goes on for a little bit more, and then Jesse quits with a dramatic look on his face.  
"Splendid. I think we can all agree?"  
"Fantastic" Sandy nods in agreement.

"Yeah, real good" Ken adds.  
"So, that's it. Jesse, you are officially back in New Directions. Congratulations." Sue says and smiles real big. Jesse smirks in return on the stage.


	5. Chapter 5

As Rachel was doing her pre-practice stretch, she was thinking of Finn. It would be lovely to dance with him considering his height – such a shame he didn't dance that well.

"Hi" someone says next to her. She turns around. Jesse. Figures. They always happened to train at the same time last year too. She simply nods, as little as possible, as an answer.

"You're not going to talk to me, huh?"

Her answer consists of her continuing on with her stretching routine.

"Look, I know I should have said this when we first met after the summer. Heck, one second after it happened, but I'm really sorry I egged you. No one deserves that, especially not you."  
"It was not so much the egging as making me fall for you as a part of a technique to win regionals."  
She does not look him in the eye while saying it, her eyes are resting on her ankles. As he says nothing to contradict it, she finally knows the whole truth she imagines. Throughout the holidays she wondered if perhaps Jesse had felt something for it, that it was not all a game. She considered his silence her answer.

"Have you spoken to Shelby lately?" he asked and cleared his throat.

"No." she looked at him. "Why, have you?"  
"Not really." he gave of a small sigh. "So, you don't know?" he tried softly.

"Of course I know she adopted Beth. Kinda hard to miss."  
"Yeah" he answered. That's not what he wondered if he knew. Though he guessed he had kinda had his answer earlier. "I really think you should talk to her. I know it must hurt knowing she adopted your enemy's baby but she's still your mother."  
"No, I don't have a mother" she said. "I have two fathers. Two fathers who have raised me. Two fathers who want anything to do with me. Two fathers who really love me. I don't need anything more, and obviously she doesn't either."

He would believe her, if she didn't give off her little noise that screamed vulnerability.

"Okay" is all he says however and goes off to the other side of the room. He doesn't want to bother her any more.

Soon enough, Finn arrives. Later than agreed, but earlier than Rachel was finished.

"It looks really great" he says.

"Thanks" she answers. She knows he doesn't really know what he is talking about, but she's sure he means it anyway.

"Are you going to be done soon or should I go get something to eat or so?"  
"No, I'm done with the exercises. Only some stretching left."  
"You want any help?"  
"Sure" she answers with a smile and as he moves to her she reaches up and gives him a peck on the cheek.

New scene *

"So, the predict is in" Will says as he hurries into the room, looking a bit rough. "It seems we now have an additional member to the glee club. Jesse, come on in."

As Jesse makes his entrance, the newcombers applaud lightly but as they realize no one else is applauding they stop.  
"Thank you, thank you very much" Jesse says sarcastically as he goes to take a seat next to Danny. Not before giving him a quick, weird look.

"So, we decided As Long As You're Mine would be our pick for the Wicked song, and as for the-"  
"Why Wicked?" Jesse asks "I think a song from Oklahoma, Funny Girl or Evita would be better".  
Rachel sits quiet. Her picks as the three musicals she would do on Broadway. Was it a pure coincidence he suggested those?  
"Thank you for your suggestion Jesse" Will says and fakes a smile "but we decided on this song during our last meeting. Maybe for our next song."

"Well, that isn't exactly fair as I wasn't there last time.. which wasn't fair since I was decided against even before singing."  
"The order of-" Will begins.

"It's okay for me" Miranda interrupts. "I don't mind if we do anything from Evita instead, and I was the one who thought we should do a Wicked song.. No pun intended."  
"No, Miranda. It was a great idea. We are going to do Wicked now and maybe we'll try Evita later and that's it."  
"Fine" Jesse says. "No need to be so mad about it."  
"I'm not.. alright, you know. Let's just decide the leads. Rachel, I know you are going to want to sing but I think we should let the others have a go."  
"Alright" Rachel says.

"No – don't.. Wait, alright?"  
"Yes, alright. I'm sure Miranda and Danny or Steve will do an incredible job."  
"Okay" Will says, still in a bit shock over this generosity. "Miranda, I suppose you will do us the honor?"  
"My honor and of course."  
"So, Steve, Danny. Are you guys ready to fight?"  
"Ehm, I don't really think it's in my area" Steve says with an apologetic look.

"Not my either." Danny agrees.  
"Come on guys, don't be shy."  
"I'd love to have a go" Kurt says with pure excitement in his voice.

Will looks at Steve and Danny and waits for an argument, but they do not say a word. Just when he is about to give Kurt the honor speaks up.

"I'd love to sing it, it's a spectacular song. And the newbies are supposed to sing this first one, right?"  
"Eh" Will says, and bites his lips.  
"Techically you're not a newbie sweetie" Kurt says "And I bet I can do it a thousand times better than you."  
"Yeah" Mercedes says. "Jesse have already sung a few leads, he is no more newbie than I am."  
"Yes, exactly. Let Kurt do it" Puck agrees and similar things are heard around the room.

"Well, what do you say to yet another Wicked Sing-Off? Kurt, this will be your second."  
"I accept that challenge" Kurt says with a nod.  
"As do I" Jesse agrees, not fully satisfied. Not with this biased crowd.

"So, prepare yourself then. 'Til next week!" Mr Schuester says and the kids storm out.


	6. Chapter 6

Finn and Rachel are deeply involved in kissing, when Rachel suddenly stops and studies Finn.

"What?" he asks.  
"How far, you know, did you and Quinn go?"  
"Not underneath the shirt, why?"  
"It's just.. I think, I'm not sure, but I think I might be, you know, ready."  
"Really?" Finn says and goes to a sitting position. "Are you, you know, sure? I don't want to pressure you or anything."  
"You don't. You haven't. You've been great." Finn smiles. "But there's something I gotta tell you" Finns smile goes away. "Oh, nothing like that. It's just.. you know I told you I had, done the deal?"  
"Yeah" he says and gets a little insecure face.

"I.. I" she stops and takes a deep breath. "I haven't. I just told you that so I wouldn't seem weak or anything."  
"Oh." he said and broods for a short moment. "I'm glad you told me." he doesn't quite seem to know what to say next.

"But I know you haven't, you know, gone all the way either so." she smiles. "We can do it together."  
Finn's breathing gets weird and he bites his lips.

"Finn, what's wrong?"  
"Nothing, or, I'm just afraid my mum and Burt are gonna come home. Can't we go up to mine and Kurt's room either to discuss it?"  
"Aren't Kurt and Puck there?"  
"Yeah but.. can we perhaps discuss it further a bit later?".  
"Sure" Rachel replies, a bit confused but also a bit relieved.

They both go in silence to Kurt's room and opens the door. Much to their surprise, Kurt and Puck aren't just on the same bed. They are involved in some heavy making out.

"Uh, guys?" Finn says, with clear um-comfort in his voice.  
"Oh" Puck says as he and Kurt suddenly are several feet apart.

"I knew it" Rachel screams. "Or, I didn't but it makes so much sense now!"  
"What does?" Kurt says, while blushing a tad.

"Why you don't seem into Finn anymore. Why Puck hasn't made any conquests. Why Finn hears punk music from here and why Puck suddenly has taking a liking to Wicked. It all makes sense now!" Rachel says, smiling.

"Not to be rude, but why are you so excited about this?" Puck asks, blushing even more than Kurt.

"Two of my friends have gotten together!" she says. While she is saying too much, Finn is saying way too little.

"Would you mind.." Kurt begins and takes a deep breath. "Not saying anything? I don't feel comfortable with spreading the word just yet. And I know Puck doesn't either."  
"Everyone knows about him. They don't know I'm bi" Puck says and looks down.

"Sure" Finn says and while he still looks a bit shocked, it seems he have at least gotten the idea now.

"Of course" Rachel says with a smile. It's going to be tough, but do-able.

**New scene ***

Before the Wicked Sing-Off glee meeting, Rachel finds herself in the room in-between Tina and Mercedes, with Santana and Brittany a few seats up. Hopeful the later mentioned girls will not hear her, as she begins discussing a very private thing.

"Tina, Mercedes" she says in a quiet tone. "I need to talk to you about something."  
"What?" Mercedes asks, with much enthusiasm in here voice.

"It's about me and Finn."  
"What?" Tina says, with an much more interested tone than earlier.

"We've talked about it, and I think about us.. you know what.." Rachel says and silences.

"Have you, you know, before? With Jesse?" Mercedes asks.

"No, but Finn hasn't either."  
"Yes he have" Santana says in a nonchalant tone.  
"What?" Rachel asks. Don't say they heard her..

"Finn has had sex."  
"How do you know?"  
"I'm the one he slept with."  
Rachel stares at her, unable to think of anything to say, to do, to feel. It's a rare moment when she just doesn't express her feelings in any way because she's not quite sure what those feelings are.

She doesn't utter a word even when all of the other members join them. Finn sits next to her and greats her, and that really puts her out of words to say.

"Hey all" Jesse says as he walks into the room, latest of them all. "I have a few words to say. Firstly, I will not be in the Wicked Song-Off." he gives a pause for gasps, but none is to be heard – even though many look at him, with shock. "Secondly, I know it's late but I still want to apologize for last years happenings. It was very wrong of me."  
"Shouldn't you say that to Rachel?" Tina asks while protectively holding Rachel's left hand, while Mercedes holds Rachel's right.

"I have and she have not forgiven me yet, but I hope I will find a way to make a mense. Anyway. Kurt, Miranda, welcome to sing."  
"Wait a minute – I expected a sing-off and I want a sing-off!" Kurt says. "Even if there is not going to be a voting afterward."  
"Only if it sing it together, I mean, both the male part".  
"Fine with me" Kurt says. They both join forces on stage and Will smiles. It's like when he and Bryan Ryan sang Dream On, but more in a kinda friendly let's-rock-this kind of way rather than competitive. They do some rehearsals and sing practices and soon they're out.  
"Wait" Finn screams at Rachel as they leave the room. "Why have you been ignoring me?"  
"I heard about Santana" Rachel simply says. Finn just stares at her then, as she walks away.

"Oh geez" she says at the door. There someone is waiting that she really doesn't feel like seeing now.


	7. Chapter 7

"Not the reaction I was hoping for" Shelby says and laughs a little, it's a sad laugh.

"I just don't feel like drama now" Rachel answers in a tired voice.  
"Now that's a first" Shelby jokes, but Rachel only stares at her. "I'm sorry. Perhaps it's not the best time, but I really want to speak to you."  
"You've told me already about your reasoning behind Beth and I-"  
"It's not about Beth. I mean, I'd like to talk more about that too, but it's not about Beth."  
"Oh." Rachel says.

"Can I take that as you wouldn't mind grabbing some coffee or tea with me?"  
"Ehm. Sure."  
They walk to the nearest coffee place in silence. Rachel, because she doesn't feel like talking really. Shelby because she doesn't want to be overheard. When they get to the first one, however, Shelby walks right past it until they get to a more cosy-looking one. Normally Rachel would approve. Now, however, she felt like being in a "sterile" environment where things wouldn't perhaps get heavy so easily.

They give their orders; Shelby a simple black coffee with nothing added, Rachel some herbal tea. Rachel gets to the seats before Shelby. She chooses a table close to the door that is not in a corner.

"So." Shelby says. "I've been asked to talk to you about something. It's about Jesse."  
"What about him?" Rachel says, interested against her will.

"You know how at first you thought he joined McKinley High because of you, and later because of he was a spy? They are both partially true. Thing is.." Shelby takes a deep breath while Rachel gasps. "I asked him to befriend you so that you and I could meet. He took it a step too far in his decision to seduce you for acting exercise, but he was in it for me."  
"How could you do it?" Rachel says, with a trembling voice. "How could you hurt me so?"  
"I know why you're upset but Rachel, I never meant to hurt you. I never thought it would go down the way it went. And I know Jesse's extremely sorry too."  
"How do you know?"  
"Who do you think asked me to talk to you about it? Anyway. I know you don't feel like forgiving me, but I want to say I'm sorry again. And that I've missed you, Rachel. I know that when I began to approach you like a mother I was a bad mother, a selfish mother, not mother-like at all. But if there's one thing Beth has taught me, is that I can be one if I want. No matter age the age of my child."

"I.. I really can't" Rachel says, looking down in her mug. She hasn't drunken anything yet.

"I know." Shelby says in a calm voice. "But I hope you one day will."  
"I think I should go now."  
"I don't. Outside there is someone waiting for you and perhaps you're not ready now. I can go, however, if you want me too."  
"I need some time alone."  
"Alright." Shelby rises from her seat. "Bye Rachel, contact me if you ever want, anything."  
"I will." Rachel nods a little and Shelby leaves the coffee shop.

Knowing that there is not a single person she would like to meet now; not even Barbara Streisand; Rachel continues to sit by the table for a long moment. She hardly touches her tea and it gets cold before she rises up and walks out the door. She doesn't really know where to go, but soon a man approaches her from a distance. Rachel knows who it is. She sighs and walks to him.

**New scene ***

"I can understand if you don't want to talk" Jesse says. "Except I can't really not talk."  
"Do I have to talk?" Rachel says.

"Not a word." Rachel nods. "Okay then" Jesse says and laughs a little, a nervous laugh. "I know you just spoke to Shelby and I don't know if that made you like me more or less.." he takes a pause, waits to see if Rachel is going to react. She stays silent. "I just wanted you to know, you know, that I didn't try to sabotage your group. I also want you to know, that it wasn't a game or so. At the beginning it was, but Rachel.. I really started to care for you. I even fell for you."

Rachel closes her eyes and turns away a little, she doesn't want Jesse to be able to read her emotions.

"Egging you is one of the worst things I've done and I must say it again, I'm really sorry."  
Right now, Rachel's lip begins to shiver but she hides it well. Jesse stares at her back, knowing this is what he expected; not being able to get a reaction; but it's not what he had imagined.

"I also must tell you about why I went back. It's not because of the grades; it was because of something, someone else; I got my grades fair and square. However, someone spread false facts about me so I lost my full ride and everything. I'm not really allowed to say who – if I do she – or he -will break into my house after a hard work out and steal my cat. It was a black mail thing. I was forced to attend just McKinley high in order to regain my full ride and everything. I would never have went back otherwise."  
At this point, having got her neutral expression back, Rachel turns to him, and simply nods.

"My kinda alternate behavior has had something to do with bugging, but I think I have found all of the devices by now so I can just be, me."

He silences and now simple looks at her.

"Was that it?" Rachel says.  
"Yes."  
"Thank you for telling me it. I've gotten some guidance."  
"For what?"  
"I can't really say.. I need to go. Bye."  
"Alright.." he bites his lips and attempts a smile. "Bye."  
Rachel waits for him to walk off and soon she picks up her cell and calls Finn. 


	8. Chapter 8

"Hey" Finn says hesitantly as he and Rachel meets in a quiet and almost empty park.

"Hi" Rachel says and nervously strokes her hair.

"Look.. I know I messed up and I'm sorry, I should-"  
"I'm not upset about it."  
Finn stares at her for a moment.

"You're not?" he feels like smiling, but doesn't dare. Rachel still looks serious.

"I thought I was, but it was something else, which is the main issue."  
"Yeah?"

"I thought I was upset because you already lost it with another girl, because I would be second, because you lied about it.. but I was only upset because you lied about it. I wasn't jealous."  
"Wait, what does that mean?"  
"It means I didn't take it as a girlfriend. I took it as a friend."  
"Rach, what are you saying?"  
"I'm saying I'm not in love with you anymore Finn."  
"Is this because of Jesse?" Finn asks. "I mean, a month ago, heck, a week ago.."  
Rachel can tell he's trying to hold back his emotions, and she wishes she knew what to say. Truth is though, she doesn't know.  
"It's not that he came back and I fell for him again and forgot about you" Rachel then says. "It's just that the infatuation is gone."  
"Infatuation?"  
"Crush. I mean.. You're still really sweet and tall and cute but.. I appreciate those things about you as a friend, not as a girlfriend."

Finn sighs and looks at her.  
"What do you want me to say Rachel?"  
"I don't expect a certain response from you. I just needed to say this because I can't keep being with you in a relationship based on emotional lies from my side."  
Finn remains silent and Rachel sits down, soon he joins her.  
"I really don't know what to say."  
"You don't have to say anything. Trust me, I know what you feel like."

"Do you?"  
"Today I heard about you and Santana and on top of that I got confessions from.. two other persons as well."  
"Tough." Finn says.  
"Yeah" Rachel responds.

"It just feels like I should have tons of stuff to say, you know."  
"I know."  
Even waiting for more of a response; for knowing what Finn really feels; Rachel feels tons of weight lifted from her shoulders. It had been quite a heavy day but at least now she knew. And those harsh moments were over.

"I guess.. I guess.." Finn bites his lips. "That I kind of agree. I mean.. don't get me wrong, it hurts. Just not nearly as much as I thought it would."  
"That's good then" Rachel says. "It hurts for me too."  
"I mean, we can be friends. I still find you hot, but I think I can keep myself from kissing you" he smiles and Rachel smiles back.

"I think Tina's kinda into you" Rachel adds. "I mean, for when you feel like dating someone new."  
"She is?" he asks.  
"Yeah. But don't go for it unless you want to, you know, for her and not for her as a rebound or something. I don't want her to get hurt like with Artie again."  
"You just broke up with me and warns me not to hurt some girl" Finn says and laughs.

"It's what friends do?" Rachel says and pulls up her shoulders.

"Friends" Finn says and takes a deep breath.  
"Friends" Rachel answers and gently puts her hand on his shoulder. Even happier than before, pleased with how good it had went; far better than she had expected. Almost as good as she had imagined it.


	9. Chapter 9

A week went by with people trying to figure out what was up with Rachel and Finn but without much success. At Thursday and the next Glee meeting, the room is creepily quiet until Rachel decides to stand up and speak up.  
"I can sense an elephant in the room, and I can only believe it has to do with me and Finn." she looks around, silence for a moment; just in case someone would protest. "Right. So. I feel free to say this to you guys now that we are all here. Finn and I have broken up, but on friendly terms."

"I knew it!" Kurt says

"I told you" Finn responds.

"But still" Kurt shrugs his shoulders.

"Why?" Tina asked, curiously.

"We don't really feel the need to examine that" Finn says, and gives a look at Rachel who nods approvingly. He got the wording right.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Will says as he enters the room.  
"Finn and Rachel broke up but stayed friends" Quinn simply says.

"..Aha." These kids, always switch partners. Will thinks of how he married his high school sweet heart. "Anyway. Ehm, where was I?"

"What's the matter mr. Schue?" Mercedes asks teasingly."Absent-minded?"  
"No, no" Will says, but the tone makes it sound like the opposite. "Anyway. Yes. Anyone who has a song they want to sing?"  
"I do" Mike says, raising his hand.  
"You do?" Will says, a bit shocked. Mike had not even had a solo line.

"Yeah" Mike says and walks up to the stage, takes a deep breath and claps his tights a couple of time. It takes a while, but then he breaks out in song.

Rachel stares at him, fascinated. His voice is alright, but the feeling is interesting. He is very nervous but he sings with such a passion. Mercedes Benz. She would wonder why he had chosen it, had he not constantly looked over to Mercedes during the performance. Right. Mercedes had told her that she was dating someone. Rachel really hoped that Mike was this someone. Or maybe not, it would be far more dramatic if he wasn't the one. Based on Mercedes pride smile though, it was obvious Mike was her kind-of boyfriend.

"Wow" Will says after the performance, as the group loudly gives their applause and Mercedes give him a kiss on the cheek. "It was.. emotionally breaking." His voice breaks as well, and he storms out the room.

"That was.. weird" Artie says and frowns his forehead.

"Yeah-" Tina begins.

"WAIT" Jesse suddenly screams, causing everyone to look at him. He is staring at Danny. "I know why I recognize you. You went to Carmel High."  
"Yes, why?"  
"You didn't make the glee club."  
"No, why?"  
"I specifically remember Shelby telling you that you were not good enough to make it."  
"Yes, otherwise I would have made it, wouldn't I?"  
"You're a spy, aren't you? Bryan Ryan sent you out specifically to ruin New Directions. It's just his style. I read in a blog about his tactics."  
"That's ridiculous."  
"Yeah?" Jesse says. "Then why are you wearing this?" he says as he lifts up one of Danny's sleeves. A fake tattoo is there, saying CH-VA.  
"I can't believe it" Kurt says with a gasp, some included.

"You are a spy!" Tina says with horror in her voice.

"What's up guys?" Will says as he re-enters the room, seemingly having collected himself.

"Danny is a spy."  
"Oh, nice. Wait, what? Get out of here."  
Danny leaves the room with a sigh.

"Can anyone tell me about what happened when I was away?"  
"Well, Will. I recognized his face from Carmel High, asked him a few hard questions. He denied everything, but it was obvious what the truth was as his arm was shown to the world with a Carmel High Vocal Adrenaline tattoo."

"It's mr. Schuester, but, good job?"  
"Yeah" Puck agrees. "Rock and roll."  
After a few more compliments to Jesse, the group continues on. Not with any singing really, but a deep talk about security. It felt like it was really lacking.

**New scene ***

"Emma" Will says as he enters her office directly after Glee.

"Will, I thought I told you to stay away."  
"You just told me you were going away."  
"Yes, but all the same." Emma doesn't sound very convincing – her voice is apologetic.

"I can't let you do that."  
"Why your sudden change of mind?"  
"Glee one again taught me something today. That you should tell people how you feel. I didn't before, but I do now. Please, Emma, don't go."  
"Will, you have no right doing this. You can't just come and say these things just when I'm moving on. It doesn't work that way."  
"Well, how does it work then?"  
"You could tell me how you feel at appropriate times."  
"There has never been one, Emma. I was with Terri. I was fresh out of the relationship. I used my space in the wrong way and pushed you away. You started dating someone else. And now you are moving off to Wyoming. I can't tell you this at any other time Emma."  
Emma takes a deep breath and looks to the right side of Will, trying to hide her face without touching it.

"Emma" Will says. "I love you. I've told you it before, and I let you get away without saying how you felt. I won't do that mistake again. Emma. I love you. Do you love me?"  
"Will, I can't just-"  
"Do you love me?"  
"It's not-"  
"Do you love me?"  
"No, no I don't Will. There. Are you satisfied?"  
"You're lying."  
"I can't do this anymore."  
"Yes you can. We can."

Emma closes her eyes and then looks at him – and can't look away. His eyes are piercing her.

"Don't do this to me."  
"I wouldn't if I didn't take it would make you happy too."  
"Can – can you just let me think?"  
"Alright. Fair enough. But just as you know – I won't give up. No matter what you do, no matter what you say."  
With that, he gives her one last look and leaves the room, leaving her sitting there filled with thoughts.


	10. Chapter 10

Rachel sits on a bench, listening to music without really hearing her. She is too pre-occupied with her thoughts. Her thoughts about Jesse. He had been in her mind a lot right after the break up, less but way too often during her time with Finn and basically non stop since her recent break up with Finn. Since it had only been a little over a week ago, she still had a lot to think about when it came to the whole situation. She had came to realize that her feelings for Jesse had returned. Not that she believed they ever really left, but during her relationship with Finn they had been repressed. Now, every time they met in the hallway, and at last Glee Club meeting, there had been this tension. They looked at each other, occasionally had small conversations but really never said anything. She was still unsure about whether or not Jesse's feelings for her had went away during the summer. She was still unsure about whether or not Jesse was aware of her feelings. She was still unsure about if she was really ready to move on. Move on in a way that was not only emotional.

Sitting on the bench was a bad idea. She left her home to go to town to take her mind off things for a while, and the first things she does is to do nothing, leaving her only to her thoughts. Not a smart thing. She walks on.

"Hey Rach"she suddenly hears someone saying over the music. She takes out her headphones and turn around, to see Mercedes.

"Hi" she says with a smile. She remembers the time where Mercedes would run in the opposite direction when seeing Rachel outside of school. "What are you up to?"  
"Lunch with my _boyfriend_."  
"So, you're boyfriend and girlfriend now, not kind-of dating?"  
"It was his song. I mean, it's about materialism and not love but still.. Puck sung something about a tramp. Oh. When it comes to Puck. Did you know he's gay?"  
"He is?" Rachel says, trying to seem surprised.

"I saw him kissing Kurt the other day. Total shocker."  
"Yeah" Rachel says and attempts a smile, though knowing the sad truth that the things the guys don't want spread out will inevitably be known by the whole school soon.

"Anyway, I must go now. Can't be too late."  
"Alright, bye" Rachel says.

As soon as there is a distance between her and Mercedes, Rachel picks up the phone and calls Kurt. She tells him about Mercedes knowing, but Puck is very calm about it. Soon she realizes that Kurt already knew, and that he and Puck will go out in public about it before Mercedes will. In a way, Rachel imagines this might actually be a good thing. Then, all of the sudden, she runs into another person she knows.

"Mr. Schue!" she says and watches him turn around from a store with walls made of glass, with his fingers still in his hair.  
"Oh, hey Rach."  
"You're going somewhere?" she points at his clothes, that look particularly nice.

"Yeah, on a date" he says, smiling. "With Emma."  
"So soon? Didn't she just break up with that dentist-guy?"  
"I know but.. She figured, and I agree, that when you feel something, why just not go for it?"

"I guess that's way to see it."  
"The only one, in my humble opinion. Even if it didn't go well the last time. And oh. There she is" he says looking over her shoulder.

"I'll go on then" she says, but gets no response. He doesn't even hear her. She did hear him though.

**New scene ***

Maybe it was a bad idea. It was a bad idea. She is sure of it. Her body doesn't listen however, and she finds herself throwing small rocks on his window.  
"Who the-" Jesse begins, then he sees Rachel.

"A lovestruck Juliet-" she begins but before getting to another word he has disappeared from the window. It was a bad idea. She feels completely ridiculous. That, until Jesse comes out the front door, practically running to her.

"Hello, is it me you're looking for?" he says and gives of a weird smile, looking kind of like he's cursing himself.  
"Yes, I was going to serenade you."  
"Wrong song, I'm afraid. I kinda have had that song in mind for a serenade myself, but it never ended well in my dreams."  
"Oh, okay" she says, unsure about what to do next. The whole thing she had done on an impulse. She had no plan whatsoever.

"You were going to serenade me, huh?" he asks, studying her face intensely.  
"Kind of. Thing is, I.. I still kind of like you."  
Without her even having the time to worry about his reaction, he gives her a kiss. A very passionate one.  
"Sorry" he says "I just had wanted to do that for some time so it was hard to hold back. I still kind of like you too."  
There is a moment of silence, when they just stare at each other like happy fools. Jesse regains his sanity soon enough.

"Look, I was just watching Cabaret. You want to come in and see it?"  
"Watch it, and not watch it, sure!"

He puts his arm around her waist and they go inside the house and sits down on his couch.

"What about Finn?" he then suddenly blurts out.

"I don't want to tell him, quite yet. Do you mind keeping quiet about this, for a while?"  
"You mean, will I be able to resist grabbing you and give you a movie kiss right in school? Not very likely, but I will do my best."  
"Treat it like an acting exercise, perhaps?" she says and gives a half-smile. It feels kind of odd, joking about it.

"Great idea" he answers. "I'm sure I have the acting chops for it."  
She scoffs at him.

"Oh, you think I don't?" he says, wide-eyed and with the hugest smile.

She shrugs her shoulders.  
"I'll just put my show face on."  
"Like now?" she asks, pointing at his face that is radiating sunshine; fully aware of the fact that her face looks exactly the same; she is an actress, she is always aware of how she looks.  
"No, no; the face is real now, you know?"  
"Yes, I know."


End file.
